This Love is Like a Hurricane Ride
by Kathey27
Summary: Caroline Forbes has always been one of those girls that only realized how much she wanted it until it was gone. / Or, It's only after he's gone that she realizes all that they could have had.


**A/N: This is due to the fact that they took away Klaus' perfect, perfect body and stuck him in Tyler. I love Tyler, I do but damn Joseph Morgan is yummy. But anyways, Joseph shall be back season four that much has been confirmed.**

**And because Caroline and Klaus is one of those couples, like Dean and Ruby, that never got everything they were supposed to have.**

**Disclaimer: If I owned anything, I'd make sure Caroline and Klaus got the ending they deserve.**

**xxxxxx**

**this love is like a hurricane ride:**

(It's only after he's gone that she realizes all that they could have had).

xxxxxx

He dies on a Wednesday and there's nothing significant about it.

Bonnie has the spell, Damon and Stefan hold him down, Elena watches from the safe background and she tries not to cry.

She doesn't realize she's failed until after Elena's holding her tight and turning her away from the ashen body. Elena holds her close and whispers "it's okay" "he can't hurt you now" "we won".

She returns Elena's hug and feels numbness consume her and _why_ are there tears falling out of her eyes? She sneaks a glance back and sees Damon dragging the body away.

He dies on a Wednesday and his eyes are on her.

xxxxxx

She goes home and touches her stained cheeks and knows why she cried.

A part of her hadn't wanted him to die.

(Maybe all of her).

xxxxxx

They won't understand so she doesn't say anything.

She doesn't really understand it herself so why bother trying to explain?

All that she knows is that whenever she walks into the Grill she expects to catch him by the bar watching her with hooded eyes and every time she goes to sleep she expects to feel the weight of his body besides her and when she's walking to school she expects to see his car pulling up and following her until she's inside.

She doesn't understand any of this because he was a killer, a cold hearted, evil killer who tormented her and her friends and ruined so many lives…

…except when he was near her. Near her he was sweet and kind and patient and persistent and romantic and everything she could have ever wanted.

(She starts to understand).

xxxxxx

Tyler isn't enough and she doesn't know how to explain this.

Tyler used to be enough. Before it, before _him._

But now, all she has are half missed chances, what ifs, and crumpled up drawings.

When she breaks up with Tyler and a reason is demanded of her, she can't really answer.

(Saying that she felt like she was betraying him didn't really seem like an appropriate response).

xxxxxx

Rebekah comes to visit her and instead of pinning her to the wall and ripping out her lungs the blonde Original smiles sadly with glassy eyes and wobbling lips and whispers: "He could have loved you. He _would_ have loved you. He would have loved you forever."

She tries to stop shaking once Rebekah leaves.

xxxxxx

"Is it weird to sympathize with serial killers?"

She asks Damon this because the older Salvatore won't judge her and her kind-of-sire is the best one to answer the question.

The slightly drunk vampire peers at her with cold eyes over the rim of the bourbon filled glass and shrugs. "Not really sure what you're getting at Blondie."

She leans on her elbows and traces forgotten promises onto the counter. Her throat burns. "Is it weird that I kind of liked him?"

She asks Damon this because Damon's Damon and Damon _gets_ it.

"Is it weird that I'll always love Katherine?"

She steals the glass and swallows it all in one gulp.

xxxxxx

Elijah stops by and hands her a small stack of papers. The Original's touch is cool and soft as she takes them into her lap.

"He," a clearing of the throat. "He would want you to have these."

She stays up all night, traces the blurred pencil marks.

xxxxxx

She tries to tell Elena what she's feeling.

(guilt, so much guilt and pain and sorrow and grief and regret and anger and confusion and disgust and lo –)

She tries to tell Elena what she's feeling but then she glances up and sees the dying humanity and burden in the brunette's eyes and instead what comes out of her mouth is news on the latest dress she bought.

xxxxxx

She goes to the sight of his death and gets angry.

She stands there and stomps on the ground and yells at him from beyond the grave and "I hope you're burning in Hell" and "you broke me, you did this to me" and "why are you in my veins" and "I'm sorry" and she falls to the ground in tears.

She's no closer to understanding why she can't let go.

xxxxxx

She makes a list in her pink diary with her fluffy pink pen.

She makes two lists actually. One list of his pros and one list of his cons.

She burns the lists later when she doesn't like the length difference between them.

xxxxxx

She runs into Kol and the youngest Original is drunk and muttering things like "always had to fall for the damned ones" and she sits down with his brother until the Original passes out. She presses a hand to her throat and tries to relive the pressure.

xxxxxx

She goes to Alaric next because Alaric's nice and listens to her rambles and never gives her condescending smiles and Alaric too has a demon inside.

"I miss him. Does that make me bad?"

Alaric gazes at her with half crazed, half sad, half sweet, and half broken eyes. "Depends, what was he to you?" The question is asked carefully.

She looks down at her heels and then up. She shrugs. "Still trying to figure that part out."

xxxxxx

She isn't sure what he was to her.

At first, he was evil.

Then, he was a tormentor.

Next, he was standing between her and Tyler.

After, he was a sweetheart.

In the end…he just might have been her salvation.

(She burns this list too).

xxxxxx

He was a killer. A murderer. A destroyer.

But he was also a boy. A boy with twinkling eyes and a British twang and a broken household. A boy who fancied her.

She's starting to realize this.

xxxxxx

Within the stack Elijah gave her there's this one picture that makes her pause.

It's hastily drawn with charcoal and it's of her at the Grill and she's sitting alone, holding a glass and looking lonely and sad and beautiful.

She has it framed.

xxxxxx

She goes to Elijah.

The immaculate Original eyes her.

"Was he capable of love?" She demands. Her hands won't stop trembling.

"What do you suppose?"

"…Did he love me?"

She gets offered a sad smile. "You know that answer to that sweet Caroline."

She runs home.

xxxxxx

She dreams of his return.

She knows it's stupid and childish but she dreams of him suddenly coming back to life so she can take back all those no's and wrong her mistakes and give him a chance.

(She stops sleeping).

xxxxxx

Stefan sees it because despite the brooding idiot's best attempts, she steals views the vampire as her best friend and there isn't anything she can hide from those piercing green eyes.

"It would have never worked out."

She ignores the words and goes back to pining.

xxxxxx

Tyler goes out of town indefinitely.

There's a note on her pillow and it has words like "okay" and "for the best" and "see you again in a century or two" and "love you always".

She places it on the other side of the room from his drawings.

xxxxxx

Rebekah comes to see her again and this time there are no tears in the blonde's eyes and the words come out steady and strong.

"We're leaving and Elijah thought you might like this."

She gets handed her bracelet.

She clutches it tightly as the Original walks away and her throat is tight and her legs are numb and she can't believe that this is the end of it all.

"Do you have room for one more?"

(Maybe not).

xxxxxx

She keeps her goodbyes short.

Elena gets a hug and a kiss and an "I'm sorry".

Bonnie gets a sad smile and a "don't forget me".

Stefan gets a sigh and a "take care of her".

Jeremy gets a smile and a "she won't wait around forever".

Alaric gets a watery smile and a "thanks for being there when no one else wanted to be."

Damon gets a sucker punch and a tiny grin and an "I expect to see you in a few decades".

(She leaves her mom a note).

xxxxxx

They go to Spain first.

It's beautiful and the people are wonderful and filled with kindness and she has Kol teach her Spanish and she bonds with Rebekah and has meaningful conversations with Elijah and she pines for him some more.

xxxxxx

They go to England and Rebekah shows her all of his favorite places and she traces museum walls longingly.

She has Rebekah recite to her the stories over and over.

xxxxxx

In Germany she stops being confused.

She's playing a game of cards with Kol and the Original is beating her and she smiles softly because she finally gets it.

"He loved me."

Kol watches her wearily. "Yes, he did."

"And I could have loved him."

Kol watches her sadly. "Yes, you could have."

xxxxxx

(She stops pining).

xxxxxx

A few decades pass before she returns to Mystic Falls.

It's weird being back because it's all different now, she's different now and it's no longer her home; her home is wherever the Mikaelsons are (bekah her friend, kol her brother, elijah her confident).

She returns to Mystic Falls and a lot has changed.

Bonnie's married and aged with kids and grandchildren and won't let her past the front door.

Jeremy smiles a wrinkled smile at her and hugs her with tenderness and "it's good to see you again".

Her mother's grave is cold and she lays down flowers and leaves quickly.

Stefan hugs her slowly and nods and she realizes whom Elena picked.

(Alaric's not there and she smiles because of course Damon wouldn't last an eternity without his soul brother, Elena or no Elena).

xxxxxx

She goes to the sight of his death one last time and smiles a wobbly smile and cries for all that they could have been.

She goes home.


End file.
